A Boy??

We are a happy family of 4. Josh and I have 2 darling little girls. Very very loud darling little girls. When we were dating we agreed that we wanted 2 kids, close together in age, whatever the genders. My sister and I are only 12 months apart, while my brother and I are 4 years apart so I've seen and experienced both sides of the sibling spacing. Josh and his sister are 4 years apart and he believes he might have gotten beaten up less if they were closer in age. (From what I've heard, it's lucky for Josh's mom that didn't happen or 1 of the 3 would've committed suicide during the teen years I'm sure.)

Anyway, when Addison was 4 months old, I chucked the pills once again and we started not trying to stop number 2. When Addison was 7 months old, we discovered we were expecting once again and straight from the beginning everyone wished us to be blessed with a boy so we could have "1 of each". Even strangers in the grocery store could foresee a male heir in our future. From the second I had shown Josh the test, he claimed to KNOW we were having a girl, "It's another girl! I know it! I'm going to be surrounded by girls!" Well, secretly, I hoped and prayed it was a girl too. For Addison's sake. I loved growing up with my best friend and I wanted her to have a sibling close like that. Someone she could have tea parties and play dress-up with, and later, in the teen years, throw I hate Mom parties, gossip about boys, and share clothes with.

On September 19th, the day before Addison's 1st birthday and party, Josh and I went to the doctor for an ultrasound and as soon as the tech scanned my belly Josh shouted out, "It's a girl! I KNEW it!" "You don't know that," I replied. The tech then confirmed, that yes, our little one was a she. We were thrilled! And we knew her name the instant we saw her sweet face after months of debating girl names. (It's harder to name your kid in round 2.) She would be Loralei Ruth. That was that. We knew we would have 2 girls and be done. I did even ask Josh as we left just to be sure that he didn't want 3 children or a son. He confirmed no, he would be happy with 2 daughters.

Still, though we were elated at the news, some family, friends and even strangers seemed disappointed. We heard comments like: "Oh, you'll change your mind", "Everyone needs a brother", "Don't you want to carry on the family name?", and "Every man wants a son." I'm not the kind of person who normally tucks her tongue in her cheek but I knew that the only opinions and insight about what works for us, is us. So I kindly, well as kindly as I could manage for someone growing more and more pregnant with a girl hearing these negative type comments about how I should be carrying a boy could take, brushed them off.

For the record, not everyone assumed or gave their opinion about us having a son. Many people asked "WHAT are you having?" before "Is it a BOY?" and then would comment on how nice it will be to re-use everything pink and not have to purchase so many clothes. But to those who feel compelled to say, "Maybe next time..." I feel compelled to reply, "Why does there need to be a next time?" It just makes me wonder why people believe that the perfect American family must have 4 people with a child in each gender? Aren't we past the days of the 1950s attitude toward families? I didn't see a girl in Leave it to Beaver. In today's society your family is what, and who, you make it. Blood doesn't always make a strong bond and a best friend can become a sister. I'm pretty sure those with 2 children of the same gender would agree with me that they don't feel anything lacking in their lives. I'd like to add that daughters can do what sons can do. Josh is already looking forward to taking our girls camping and fishing and to play sports and paintball. We don't need a boy/son/brother to be complete.

Plus, we don't want to be outnumbered by our kids. That's just crazy! ;)